Bullies/haters/mean girls exist… and the sad truth is, they’ll always be around! These people are usually rude, mean, or verbally abusive in an effort to make you feel insecure or  feel better about themselves.

Whether in the office at work, on campus at university… heck, even your future next door neighbor. You never know when you’re going to encounter a bully or mean girl, but there are ways to handle them. Check out my video (above) for the full scoop… and feel free to check out the bullet points below for a bite-size version!

• Take it as a compliment.
  • “The moment anyone tries to demean or degrade you in any way, you have to know how great you are. Nobody would bother to beat you down if you were not a threat.” -Cicely Tyson
    
• Try to befriend them.
  • Understand where it’s coming from. Jealousy? Misunderstanding? Maybe you’re so alike that you’re clashing because there’s not room for two of you… it could be something you eventually bond over, or use to combine forces for a mutually beneficial arrangement at work.
• Confront them.
  • Nip it in the bud early on. Once someone knows you’ll let them walk over you, it’s very hard to undo that. Make it clear that you don’t appreciate it. Distance yourself. if possible. Report to an authority figure, if necessary.
• Ignore them.
  • Bullies get off on seeing you squirm. Don’t give them the satisfaction of knowing their tactics are working.
• Whatever you do… DON’T Dim Your Light!!!
  • It’s probably because they see something in you that threatens them, and they want to kill that wonderfulness that’s inside of you. Don’t shrink!
    • An excerpt from ‘Still I Rise’ by Maya Angelou: 
      • You may write me down in history
        With your bitter, twisted lies,
        You may tread me in the very dirt
        But still, like dust, I’ll rise.Does my sassiness upset you?
        Why are you beset with gloom?
        ‘Cause I walk like I’ve got oil wells
        Pumping in my living room.Did you want to see me broken?
        Bowed head and lowered eyes?
        Shoulders falling down like teardrops.
        Weakened by my soulful cries.You may shoot me with your words,
        You may cut me with your eyes,
        You may kill me with your hatefulness,
        But still, like air, I’ll rise.Does my sexiness upset you?
        Does it come as a surprise
        That I dance like I’ve got diamonds
        At the meeting of my thighs?Bringing the gifts that my ancestors gave,
        I am the dream and the hope of the slave.
        I rise
        I rise
        I rise.

• And another of my favorite quotes:
  • “Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure… We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

XOXO, Z